My Welcome

Introducing Myself Hello conscientious readers. My name is Jason and I have never been circumcised (not clitoral circumcision, obviously). Now I shall offer a hello to those of you (readers) who are not so conscientious (the conscientious ones will have stopped reading). I am six feet and four inches tall if I stand on my fingernail (it's really long and quite strong, too), otherwise I am approximately five feet and some number of inches (a natural number, of course). Today's Maths Lesson What is a natural number? You probably don't want to know, but I'll tell you anyway. A natural number is a positive integer (1, 2, 3, ...). For more information, see MathWorld (you'll thank me). Today's Grammar Lesson Today's grammer lesson is on acronyms. An acronym is an abbreviation composed of the first letters of other words so that the abbreviation itself is a word. For example: CRASSH: Centre for Research in the Arts, Social Sciences, and Humanities Aids: Acquired immuno deficiency syndrome Acronyms are treated just like ordinary words in a sentence, and may be composed of all capital letters, or of an initial capital followed by small letters. Note: The term acronym is not to be confused with the term initialism, which is an abbreviation composed of the first letters of other words where the abbreviation itself is not a word. For example: RAA, which stands for the Royal Automobile Association. Now that we all know what the difference between an initialism and an acronym is, there's no excuse!

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Recent debate between Denley and Angus could not have come at a better time. It made me think about economics, perfect oppurtunity because I was studying for my Economics exam at the time, well-done guys… Ahh Economics, I love economics. It's a science, but also philosophical. It can analyse, relies on measurements, and yet can’t reach to an all-encompassing solution. The free-market economy is the flagship of the concept of absolute free choice. However, markets may not always be efficient in providing you the optimum price, this leads us into the idea of market efficiency. Market efficiency relies on the fact that consumers will buy products based on their ability to increase their surplus…what is consumer surplus? It’s the positive difference between what consumers are willing to pay relative to market price. See Diagram 1, the blue shaded area is consumer surplus. Diagram 1 So we always assume in 99% of economic models that consumers will always to buy the cheaper good. So if firm A sells a good at $5 and firm B sells the same product at $3, ceteris paribus (all other factors being equal), the consumer will buy from firm B. This is considered to be rational economic thinking. Surely, consumers will buy a cheaper substitute good if available, after all, isn’t that the point of firm competition? Then why do we see people buy brand names over generic goods? Let’s take the groceries as an example. Most people would prefer to buy that good ol’ Sanitarium backed cereal over that Black & Gold or Home Brand cereals. Why is this so? Focus groups show that generic brands taste no different to brand names, yet even though generic products are cheaper, most consumers will buy brand names. This is because of a misconception that a brand name may be superior to the generic product. This is not always the case (although a higher price may be justified, e.g. higher quality). This form of inequity is due to advertising. Nike is better than New Balance, because the advertisement told me so. The subversive advertising of Coke and Macdonalds. If you drink Coke, you too can have a beach party! Advertisements do not concentrate on the factual information of a product and use it as a platform for competition for MOST goods. Nike is better than Adidas, because… so it could be argued that advertising makes markets inefficient because the perception of consumers is being altered, they no longer become concerned with the price, but with the brand name. Would you buy a Palsonic over a Panasonic? Pepsi or Coke? or Diagram 2 shows effect of a successful advertising campaign (which reduces consumer surplus). Notice the shift of the demand curve from D to D2. Diagram 2 However, it could be argued that advertising contributes to market efficiency by making consumers aware of the product. Without advertising, how would you know about new entrant firms into a market? How would you know about that stocktake sale at JB’s. Or the new model of Motorolas is out? Advertising (according to advertising firms) is a form of consumer information. Information is POWER. So does advertising encourage market failure? Never expect a yes or no answer for an economic question. Every economic solution involves a cost. Advertising does indeed make the market a bit inefficient, with brand-loyalty being an example of this. However, it does act as a form of consumer information. Therefore, a regulated advertising firm is a good compromise between the two extremes. Now, is the increase in ads during the cricket a sign of market failure? This is hard to say….are the social costs and benefits at equilibrium? How can we measure the enjoyment of cricket? We can measure the cost of the broadcast, as this consists of crew wages, broadcasting rights, air time, satellite rent (if an overseas event). But unless we can measure the benefit of watching cricket (preferably in dollar terms) it is hard to determine if this is indeed market failure. Cricket, as far as I know, does not provide any positive externality (any positive benefit to society). The consumer surplus for watching Cricket on free-to-air TV is widely varied. For the fanatics, it may be large (e.g. they are willing to pay for Foxtel if required) to the casual viewer (who are not willing to switch to Foxtel). Thus, if advertisement rates increase by a small amount, we may not see a spiral at all, because the demographic is so varied. The broadcasters are aware of this, they would never put an ad that cuts into the final over of an inning. They know how to balance the benefit of the viewers with production costs. Me personally, I find the cost of Fox Sports just to watch cricket far above the price I’m willing to pay to watch a few advertisements, but I’m one end of the cricket watching community. There is no final solution in economics, just a compromise. Enjoy watching ads? Online searchable advertisement archive Argument for generic drugs A Coke Summer Campaign

An all-American...you know what's coming...

I have profound respect for the military. I mean, in general. The bureaucracy of the higher echelons usually annoys the hell out of me. In my opinion, Pte. Lynndie England should have been lined up against a wall and shot. And I don't have time for those soldiers who decide it's fun to go and set fire to kittens, or beat the living daylights out of new recruits. That's not what the army, navy and air force is all about. Unfortunately, humanity tends towards violence, and the armed services are a necessary evil. There are also moments of great courage and daring-do, from figures such as Alexander the Great, Admiral Horatio Nelson, Wing Commander Guy Gibson, Feldmarshall Erwin Rommel, just to name a few. In their own right, these men were heroes. But this is what I want to rant about today. No, not war. Not the military. Just that one word: "HERO". I'd like to get something straight with you: in my book, a hero is someone who does something quite extraordinary, not for his/her own sake, but for others. That doesn't mean that lending someone $5 for their lunch makes you a hero. However, this seems to be what the word is being degraded towards. Let's see some examples: Ted Smout, WWI veteran (dec.) Sergeant Ted Smout enlisted in the Army at age 17, and worked on the Western Front on latrine duty, carrying sanitation buckets. He was one of only two remaining First World War veterans in this country until his death last year. Now, it is true that this man served our country in a time of war, and carrying sanitation buckets in a warzone is by no means my idea of a safe and easy job. Yes, he was also awarded the French Legion of Honour, which the French Government have awarded almost every veteran from all allied countries who fought on French soil in the Great War. But when your claim to fame is that you weren't killed, that doesn't make you a hero. Even Ted Smout himself said that he was no hero in the war, and yet, when he died, what did the press refer to him as? "Our Fallen Hero". The man served our country, doing a job I wouldn't be caught dead doing. That is a credit to him. He has earned my respect for that. The Prime Minister called Smout a "lovely man", which I don't doubt. I just don't see how a latrine worker who was lovely can be categorised as a hero, merely because he dodged a bullet, shell or mustard gas. The five dead crewmembers of a crashed Royal Australian Navy Westland Sea King helicopter I'm sure you all remember the incident: during Australia's sterling relief effort of Aceh Province in Indonesia, a Sea King helicopter from the HMAS Kanimbla, carrying seven personnel, crashed, leaving five dead and the other two wounded. The next day, the front page of The Advertiser, that magnificent sentinel of the free printmedia, was adorned with the huge bold lettering HEROES. There was talk of posthumously awarding the dead crew the Order of Australia, or the Distinguished Service Medal. It's tragic that, while doing very worthy work, these people were killed by a mechanical fault that sent their helicopter plummeting like a stone into the ground, but let's face it, piloting an aircraft is risky business. Bernie Lewis wasn't a hero when his light plane crashed in New Zealand. Why are these servicemen heroes for getting killed? They weren't doing anything selfless or courageous...they were doing their jobs, and something went wrong. It's a damn shame, but it's not an act of extraordinary bravery. Strangely, the two survivors were not considered for the aforementioned medals. Are they thus considered not heroes because they had the good fortune of enduring the crash? They were doing the same work as the others. So I suppose it's virtuous to be killed while delivering aid, but not if you live. How odd... Douglas Wood, ex-captive in Iraq Okay, it's obviously not the nicest thing in the world to be held captive, under threat of death. I suppose you also need a good deal of courage to make it through such an ordeal. But let me be quite frank here: Douglas Wood did nothing. Not a sausage. He sat around and waited to be rescued, released or killed. Douglas Wood is a contractor, 63 years of age, in fairly ill health. He did not go to Iraq to "better the situation" of the impoverished Iraqi people, he went there to make money. And lots of it. Working in Iraq is a very lucrative business these days; due to the danger posed by insurgents, the pay is quite excellent. Douglas Wood knew the danger. In fact, he was counting on it; with the threat of possible capture and/or death, his pay-cheque was most impressive. The fact that he knew all of this and was then captured does not make him a hero. The fact that he was released and rescued, likewise. Even so, the press has gone bananas. He's sold his story of his "terrifying ordeal" for some $250,000, and journalists have been quick to call him a hero, because of his ability to endure his tenure as a prisoner. Douglas Wood is alive and well. Good for him. I didn't want him dead. But I'm not going to glorify and idolise him because he took a risk to make money and lost, nor because his rescue was organised at the cost of some $10,000,000 to the Australian Government. It's good that he's alive. But he should be no one's hero. How else can we trivialise the idea of heroes? Maybe Billie-Joe Armstrong will be the next international hero, because American Idiot sold well around the world. Or will it be Roger MacPherson from 26 Smith Street, London, because he went and bought a tin of food for the cat, risking getting caught in the rain? Perhaps it will be yours truly, Bodie Ashton, because I played indoor soccer on Friday... So the next time you staple an assignment together, maybe you too will stop thinking "that's another assignment out of the way", and start thinking about how you could be the next world idol, because you risked a nasty paper-cut, but survived unscathed.

TV Ads Suck In The Free Market Economy

This is two posts a row from me, but I know most of you wonderful contributors, if not all of you are too busy studying for impending uni exams to post any new material. Not studying at uni this year and therefore not doing much at all ;) I'll guess I'll take the slack. But I'm working on finally getting my Ps. And I'm playing a little bridge. And I'm planning for my overseas trip. I'm only here till July 27th people! But hopefully everyone is not too busy to visit the Casbah every so often to see how Juan and Justin's brainchild is ticking along. Bear with me, I'm just starting to unleash my current mother of all rants. I watched Australia lose against both England and BANGLADESH.......that's right......BANGLADESH recently and was shocked and appalled that it was Channel 7 who was broadcasting Australia's paltry performances, not the usual Channel 9. Apart from missing the commentating greats of Richie, Tony and Greg CHANNEL 7 SHOWED 2 ADS AT THE END OF AN OVER INSTEAD OF THE USUAL 1 BY CHANNEL 9!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Perhaps you need to be a cricket lover to truly realise the implications of this but really it just means more ads that you don't want to see and less cricket that you do. I thought for a few seconds about this and realised IT IS THE FAULT OF THE FREE MARKET ECONOMY. THIS IS AN EXAMPLE OF MARKET FAILURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And here's my reasoning to do everybody's favourite economics teacher, Mrs Wong proud. It also kind of avenges the 5 I got for IB Eco because the IB idiot markers in Geneva or Timbuktu or La Paz couldn't follow simple cross referencing. Idiots. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Australian television stations compete for broadcasting rights of the cricket. Only one (usually) can broadcast the cricket and the rights go to the highest bidder. So ceteris paribus the station with the most money broadcasts the cricket. Stations get the money to pay for the cricket by advertising. In order for Channel 7 to outbid Channel 9, they need to include more advertising. As cricket is an essential good/service in Australia, people will put up with a lot of advertising before switching off. Hence we have A VICIOUS SPIRAL where in order to outbid one another, broadcasters must include more and more advertising, infuriating viewers before a limit is reached. THIS IS KNOWN AS THE FOXTEL PHENOMENOM Commercial television is free. To pay for the costs of broadcasting, broadcasters must use their medium for advertisment. Foxtel is private television (you need to pay to watch it). IT IS A PRIVATE GOOD/SERVICE. As more and more peoples' fed-up-with-advertising-threshold is reached, they will abandon commercial television and switch to Foxtel. Now Foxtel can outbid commercial stations for the cricket. So now people can only watch the cricket on Foxtel. Once a significant population uses Foxtel, Foxtel gets greedy. IT STARTS PUTTING ON ADVERTISEMENTS and increasing its income (Subscription fees + advertisement fees). Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. And now, in the not too distant future, the spiral will continue. A FOXTEL 2 will be formed, charging even more money than FOXTEL because it promises no ads. It will outbid FOXTEL for broadcasting stuff and then introduce ads. THEN FOXTEL 3 WILL FORM. THEN FOXTEL 4. THEN 5. YOU GET THE FUCKING POINT. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. I wont pretend I know an answer for this problem, because advertisement provides a vital role in actually providing funds for getting stuff going. So blame human greed. And Channel 10's self promotion. WHY ARE THEY SELF PROMOTING!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU'RE ALREADY WATCHING THE FUCKING CHANNEL!!!!!!!!!!!! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!

A Tribute To Ayrton Senna da Silva

I was feeling a little sad and depressed today, and it was in this miserable mood when I remembered the untimely death of one, if not the greatest of the idols of my youth: The master racing driver Ayrton Senna da Silva. Ayrton Senna da Silva was born on the 21st of March 1960, in a wealthy family in Sao Paulo. Shy and awkward as a boy, his father noticed 4 year old Ayrton's passion and determination behind the wheel of his first go kart, a tiny 1 hp thing. An ordinary student, Senna lived for motor racing, going every weekend to the local park for a drive and by the time he was 8, driving the family car. At 10, his father gave him his first "real" 100cc cart and at 13, could start to compete in Brazil. Spurred on in 1972 by Brazil's first F1 champion, Fittipaldi, and the Interlagos circuit becoming a permanent fixture in the FIA racing calendar Senna looked to Europe to continue his racing dreams. After escalating through the Brazilian carting ranks, Senna was racing Formula Ford 1600cc cars in Britain in 1981 where his driving prowess, especially in the wet where he eclipsed all competition, was noted. After a 4 month retirement due to his trouble in finding sposors at higher eschelons of the sport, Senna broke in to Formula 3 as a pre season favourite along with British driver (and now comentating formerly along with John Walker) Martin Brundle. The Championship was decided by the final race of the season between the two; Senna took pole and in the end won comfortably. Serious discussions were held on the team to accomodate Senna in Formula 1 for the 1984 season. Team Brabham were very interested, but Senna's interest was vetoed by champion Piquet. In the end Senna settled for second-tier team Toleman. In a shitbox car (that was still capable of 340+ km/h, but shitboxiness is relative) there was little Senna could do......until it rained. At Monaco in rain he pressed his authority over the field and was phenomenally quicker than everyone else. He passed leader Alain Prost on lap 32 having been 7.4 seconds behind at the start of lap 31. Unfortunately the race was stopped at the end of lap 31 but the legend was born. Modern F1 racing has become so sterilised and orchestrated that the glory days of the 70's and 80's seem another world away. This is the time when the turbo charger ruled, where drivers demanded the authority they deserved and blamed the car for everything. When Ron Dennis at McLaren shunned Sega sponsorship because he didn't want a blue hedgehog on his red and white cars and where in the McLaren garage, tape was cut with a scapel. When cars ran out of fuel DURING the race. When motor racing was acceptably dangerous. The same race at Monaco, Prost in the lead came upon the stalled Teo Fabi. Just manging to swerve around the car, Prost hit one of the track marshalls. Shaken and not knowing whether the man was still alive Prost slowed down. Mansell, a much harder man, seized the opportunity and overtook Prost, before spinning out shortly afterwards. When Enzo Ferrari's motto: "Aerodynamics are for people who can't make engines" caused raised eyebrows, but was healthily respected. Here are the four champions together. From left to right: Senna, Prost, Mansell, Piquet Senna moved to Lotus in 1985 and won his first race in the wet at Estoril and followed it with another at Spa. Not even he could restore Lotus to their former glory and joined McLaren in 1988 with Prost. Ironically Prost did not use his veto power against the Brazilian and instead welcomed him. That happy relationship was short lived. He and Prost fought tooth and nail and he won his first Championship that year. The next, 1989, Prost won, despite Senna having more wins. The two would be on the front row of the grid nearly every single race. The sheer animosity between the two led to Prost leaving for Williams in 1990, and Senna won back to back titles in 1990 and 1991 competing in fierce battles against the Williams' of Prost and Mansell. Eventually loss of Honda engines and the rise of Renault Bennetton would dull McLaren's ability to compete. In 1994 he was offered a position at Williams which he eagerly took, but surprisingly came 2nd in both of the opening races of the season to a young Michael Schumacher in a dominant Bennetton. Tragically, he died at the infamous Tamburello corner whilst leading the San Marino Grand Prix, from a suspected steering failure. The whole Grand Prix community (and me) grieved for a lost wonder and he was given a state funeral in Sao Paulo where a national day of mourning was declared. Senna, with his dedication to win and sheer audacity, his awesome technical skill with an underperforming car and absolute mastery in the wet are sorely missed in today's Schumacher dominated era. One can only imagine the entertainment Senna and Schumacher could have given us as two unstoppable personalities on a single track fighting for the same Championship. Ayrton Senna 1960 - 1994 Lest We Forget

The Soapie Script

I recently wrote this script for Days Of Our Lives and will be sending it to the show's producers for consideration as an actual episode. Since the real character names are unknown to me and I care not for their pathetic, superficial asses I have created my own, which hopefully the shows writers can adapt to. I suggest they scrap their current cast altogether, not just because they are abysmal actors, but also because they have no soul and deserve to be jobless; these creatures belong on street corners, selling their plastic bodies to men and woman alike. I am sure they will find the time to fulfil my requests as the calibre of this script is far superior to anything they could dream of. Episode 9562 Roll theme music … “Like sands through the hourglass, these are the days of our lives…” SCENE 1: Location: Pool-room - Characters: Jake, Clarise [Clarise walks into the pool room and finds Jake playing with himself] CLARISE: “Jake, I am so angry. I’m gonna spend the next half hour blathering pointless crap that nobody cares about.” JAKE: “Hey babe, lay it on me, right now I got hours n’hours to burn so I can take all the bitchin joo please.” CLARISE: “Of course you’ve got hours to burn, you screwed your bosses 17 year old daughter and got fired, REMEMBER?” [Rapid pan and zoom-in on Jake’s face, who appears to be pleased with himself] JAKE: “That’s right.” (runs hand through hair) [Rapid zoom-out and pan to centre characters] CLARISE: “Yea well … anyways what I came in here to talk about was that I am very distraught about something Harry told me earlier about Janise.” JAKE: “Sure thing babe, tell me all about it I’m all ears (lines up a ball and takes a shot) CLARISE: “Harry told me that Prue told him that Jasmine told her that Janise is seeing a psychiatrist!” [Rapid pan and zoom-in on Jake’s face, he is lining up a shot and looks up at Clarise with a distraught expression] JAKE: Woah. [Rapid zoom-out and pan to centre characters] CLARISE: “tell me about it, I don’t know what is wrong with her.” JAKE: “How did she bag a psychiatrist? Those dudes are way outta her skanky league.” CLARISE: “She’s not DATING one you dumbshit. Oops.” (covers mouth) JAKE: “Keep your anger under control, phsyco lady. I’ve had enough of this crappy conversation and I’m moving onto the next scene, which will be in the kitchen.” [Jake throws cue on the ground in an unexplained fit of anger and walks from the room, Clarise remains seated on the couch and is crying for no reason.] SCENE 2: Location: Kitchen – Characters: Jake, Gary, Karyl [Jake is making himself lunch when Gary walks in] GARY: “Howsit hangin’, son. JAKE: “WHASSUP daddio just whipping up a crazy-ass sandwich complete with lettuce, cheese and tomato. Insane! GARY: “Pretty ambitious sandwichery there, son. The doc said to lay off the lettuce for a while though, and I don’t want to be a scrooge but..-” JAKE: “Gimme a break, its MY life, I’ll be screwed if you or some crappy doctor tells me what to do. You think I don’t know what kind of effect lettuce has on me? Huh? I know all about lettuce, what do you know? You read some shit in a book and you think you know what’s best for me. Well I am in this hell, and you are looking IN. If I want to eat lettuce, I’ll fucking eat it. Now FUCK OFF. GARY: (sighs) “Alright, son.” [Gary walks away, shaking his head and feeling helpless to Jake’s unstoppable lettuce abuse. Jake continues to make his sandwich, and he is manic now, stuffing entire lettuce leaves into his mouth and foaming at the mouth as he slices his sandwich into halves with a huge knife.] [Karyl walks in, Jake is standing at the fridge putting things away with his back to her] KARYL: “Jake, I just spoke to your father… this lettuce consumption has got to stop, your throwing your life away.” [Jake swings around, fire in his eyes and blade in hand. He bares his teeth to show a snarl brimming with lettuce.] JAKE: “RRAAAAAAAWR!!” [Jake hurls the knife at Karyl with all his strength. It spins through the air, the blunt end slams her in the head and she falls backwards onto the floor] KARYL: “OH MA GAWD OH MA GAWD I GOT STABBED IN THE HEAD. [Jake runs over to her and grabs her by her shirt with one hand, slapping her with the other] JAKE: “Quit it biznatch. QUIT IT. YOU TOOK THE HANDLE.” [scene ends with an overhead shot of Jake slapping his mother repeatedly across the face] SCENE 3: Location: Josie’s room – Characters: Josie, Laura [Josie and Laura are hanging out in the bedroom, tearing up magazines and sticking crappy pictures onto their school books] LAURA: “What’s going on out there?” JOSIE: “What do you mean? I don’t hear nothing. LAURA: “Doesn’t sound like nothing. In fact it sounds like someones getting their ass handed to them, shouldn’t you check it out.” JOSIE: “Just drop it, okay?” LAURA: “No but it REALLY sounds like someones getting hurt” JOSIE: “OH MA FUCKING GAWD THERES NOTHING GOING ON, JUST DROP IT. CHRISSAKE. AWWWWWW pRAT.” [Josie flips out and starts pulling on her own hair, rolling around the floor] LAURA: (pause) Josie? What the hell? Take it easy… [Laura gets up and slowly, cautiously moves for the phone on Josie’s dresser. At this point Josie is curled up in a ball in the corner, rocking back and forth, and occasionally biting chunks off an UHU gluestick] [Laura dials into the phone (one-way conversation)] LAURA: “Mum.. I’m ready to be picked up from Josie’s… yea everything’s juuust fine. (Laura is mumbling incoherently in the background) When will you be here… now? Okay good. Don’t be afraid to really step on it.” [Laura moves towards the door] LAURA: “Alright seeya Josie I have to wait for mummsy outside! You easy up on that glue now.” [She opens the door slightly, peeking left and right to make sure the way is clear. Screams echo down the hallway from the kitchen area. She makes a run for the back door past the laundry but Jake’s bedroom door flies open and Gary pushes a trolley full of lettuces out, blocking her way] GARY: “LOOK AT HIS KARYL, JUST LOOK” [Laura turns around, realising her only escape is through the kitchen and out the front. She runs through, noticing Karyl standing over Jake repeatedly hitting him in the head with a dustbuster. Clarise walks in from the pool-room, tears still streaming down] CLARISE: “You heading off Laura?” LAURA: “Yea.” CLARISE: “Take it easy, hah you must think this place is a bit of a madhouse. Hey tell your sister to call me we should catch up.” LAURA: “Not at all, and I’ll tell her for sure…” JAKE: (looks up from on the floor) “Seeya, Laura.” LAURA: “Yea bye…” [Laura runs out the door] [Scene fades. Montage begins, showing in slow motion Laura running through the door and outside. Montage is to the tune of the Star Trek: Enterprise Theme Song by M People “It's been a long road, Gettin from there to here, It's been a long time, But my time is finally here…” etc. You see slow-motion images of Josie eating glue, camera zoomed in on her crazed face. Cut to a birdseye shot in the hall way showing Gary pushing the trolley full of lettuces past in slow motion. Cut to the kitchen where Clarise is pouring a glass of milk as Jake and Karyl wrestle over a piece of lettuce on the floor. Camera pans across the room, then moves through the house mimicking the flight of a bird, after passing all the rooms the camera flies out the front door and you see Laura getting into the car as it passes over the top and over the roofs of other houses, up, up into the sky. Shot fades to black, as does the reflective music. Days Of Our Lives theme music ensues and credits roll] That's it, I hope you enjoyed it and any comments would be appreciated.

Crazy Frog

Crazy Frog...that stupid crazy frog....although the origin of the frog is not a frog, it's from Daniel Malmedahl. This man is responsible for creating a number one hit. A hit that overtook Coldplay in the UK Pop Charts. You see, from this man, he spawned a ringtone craze! If he only realised that it will be remixed twice and be converted into a single...This frog has become the latest thing in popular ringtones. The ringtone itself is ok, I actually don't hear any on the streets. But it's the excessive advertising (mostly through ringtone company Jamster) that bugs me. It's everywhere! This guy snorts cocaine using the money he earned from Crazy Frog The Battle vs. It's on TV, on the radio and now it's creeping excessivley into web banners! Not only that, but the web banners have a music sample of the Crazy Frog Axel F remix! Arrrrrrgh. Now everytime I check my mail or edit my Bravenet settings I get this annyoing synthesiser music techno remix crap blaring on my speakers! You heard me, remixed pieces of crap. So that got me thinking...From one of my earlier posts on Hip Hop music...what constitiutes real music? Is this remix of a man imitating a Swedish Moped real music? Can you tell me the actual skill involved in dubbing a sample of a ringtone over a techno beat? This piece of crap beat Coldplay, a band that had to learn their own instruments! Not the programming knowledge of a mixing program. Nothing unnerves me more than a DJ (of the non-turntablism kind) believing there is some real skill in mixing two songs..."LOOK I CAN CROSSFADE! Now give me money and bitches". Bedroom DJ's don't mean jack in my book...bring on the musical masters of instruments such as Bach, Beethoven, Hendrix, Charlie Parker, Ray Charles etc etc. What a sad state of affairs! Already I was under the impression that there was alot of crap on the pop charts only to be told that a ringtone is considered better than all that crap. What a load of crap! That means we have a piece of shit leading a chart of crap. You following me? Maybe shit is the new "in" thing for music these days....how would I know how these teeny boppers think. Next thing you know it, they will be playing video clips of Shit on MTV and VH1. Why not? Now why don't I make a remix of "Mary had a little Lamb" to the beats of "In Da Club". Sounds shit? Good, that means it will be number one. Here's a preview of my new video clip from my band called Shit. P.S. I'm sorry, but I said shit and crap 11 times...too much for me

SexGod - 1 Dolly Doctor - 0

These letters have come from the January 2005 issue of DOLLY, written to the Dolly Doctor, who needs to be put into his place! Letter #1 Last week, I went to my friend’s party. We all had too much to drink and my boyfriend and I had sex. When we finished, my vagina started hurting, and now, every time I go to the toilet it stings. Sometimes it just starts hurting for no reason. Has my boyfriend damaged it? Response from Dolly Doctor It does sound as though something has happened, but don’t panic! It could be something very simple and curable! …If you had sex without a condom, you should get checked for STI’s...It is very unlikely that the sex itself caused any physical harm, unless it was extremely rough... Mr SeX GoD’s Rebuttal One word…panic! Most likely you’ve screwed something up, whether or not it was due to the sex itself. Are you a clean person? Do you cheat on your boyfriend? Is this just karma bitting you back on the butt? Either way, its time to take control! Join that convent you were contemplating of! Start using soap and washing yourself more than once a month! Use a goddamn condom, unless you’re a die-hard catholic…though, if you were, you probably wouldn’t be in this mess in the first place! What am I trying to say? Im saying, stop blaming your boyfriend! (Though, if your looking for ideas for revenge, some suggest the use of scissors to remove any bits you want to hang on your wall, though I totally condemn that) They’re your special parts, and you need to be looking after them more carefully! I mean, there has to be thousands of transsexuals wishing they had the same parts as you, but nooooo, you have abuse what you were given! Bottom line…stick to masturbating…and with that, I suggest using a glove… Speaking of masturbation… Letter #2 I masturbated using a lubricant and I think I might have ripped myself because it really stings. Also, if I masturbate, do I need a pap smear? Response from Dolly Doctor Masturbation doesn’t cause any real physical harm, and you don’t need a pap smear unless you’ve had sexual intercourse…If you’ve been masturbating vigorously, you might have grazed or torn a bit of vaginal lining (for example, if you had long nails or used an object) …When you masturbate, make sure you wash your hands before and after… Mr SeX GoD’s Rebuttal Heres an example of someone needing a boyfriend/girlfriend! I mean, its obvious that she masturbates way TOO much as it is! That and shes into some really kinky stuff! Id like to firstly point out that when using objects to masturbate: A – Make sure the item has been washed, or place a condom onto it B – Make sure its not breakable. Make sure its not rusty/yucky! C – Umm, STOP OVER MASTURBATING! Also, there’s no need to be swirling the object around like your stirring a pot of pumpkin soup. Ive always thought gently as she goes was better than Sir-Mix-A-Lot! Finally, for the love of Jebus, WASH YOUR HANDS! You don’t need to masturbate straight after cleaning that toilet, or washing that dog…unless your absolutely turned on, which is so very very wrong… Ill be back before the end of the week with more letters!

I can smell rubber burning...

As many of you who know me would no doubt be aware, I am quite critical and skeptical of organised religion. At the same time, though, I pride myself upon my openmindedness; I have Catholic, Anglican, Muslim and Buddhist friends, and I respect and accept their customs and views without consigning them to the "inferior" pile. In my view, regardless of whether or not I agree with one's religious beliefs, one is well within one's rights to hold those beliefs; no religion or culture is either superior or inferior to another. Having said that, I cannot but marvel at the latest (although thoroughly unsurprising) directive of the new pontiff, Pope Benedict XVI. The pope recently addressed a congregations of bishops from South Africa, Botswana, Namibia, Lesotho and Swaziland, who brought up their continued concerns over the spread of HIV/AIDS in Africa. Despite the Vatican's spirited resistance against the use of contraception, many of these bishops have openly claimed that widespread use of condoms on the continent could drastically slash the number of HIV infections, and therefore also HIV-related deaths. Benedict responded: "The traditional teaching of the church has proven to be the only failsafe way to prevent the spread of HIV/Aids." http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/4081276.stm Now, please excuse me for being naive, but how can the pope possibly claim this, in the face of such overwhelming counter-evidence? The pope, much like he predecessor, seems to believe that abstinence and faithfulness are the only true solutions in the fight against AIDS. Pope John Paul II advocated this too. Let's see how this idea fared: Of the estimated 40,000,000 people worldwide who suffer from HIV/AIDS, it is believed that at least 60% of these live in sub-Saharan Africa. South Africa leads the vanguard of the African fight against AIDS, due to its status as a developed and modern state. Despite this, between 600 and 1,000 people die every day due to AIDS. There are two conclusions we can draw from this. Either: 1. Africans are adhering to the teachings of the Catholic Church and not using contraception and anti-HIV medicines, but it doesn't make a blind bit of difference. 2. Africans, regardless of whether they are staunch Catholics or not, are ignoring Church teachings. Either way, it seems redundant for Benedict to advocate something that clearly, for one reason or another, is not working. But wait, there's more! Benedict's reason for denying the opportunity to stymie the spread of AIDS, by not advocating the widespread distribution and use of condoms, is, by his own admission, because contraception leads to the "breakdown of sexual morality." Now, I am going to assume for just a second that he's hit the nail on the head here, although this is patently not what I believe. Surely, the Vatican must see that, while it is all well and good to have a certain set of morals, a prerequisite for being able to impose these morals is for there to be a living population which can be imbued with them. At the rate that it's going in Africa, this might well not be the case: "The UN estimates that without new initiatives...more than 80 million Africans may die from Aids by 2025 and HIV infections could reach 90 million, or 10% of the continent's population." AIDS is spreading exponentially, like the proverbial wildfire, through Africa, and the pope refuses to give his blessing to something which could literally save tens of millions of lives, because it is morally questionable. A note to the pontiff, if I may: at some point, morality must yield to pragmatism. This is that point, sir. Do not pass it by. At the other end of the spectrum is this man: The young man being carried in the photograph is Mzokonah Malevu, an African man in his twenties who contracted HIV/AIDS. He allowed photographer Gideon Mendel to provide photographic witness to his struggle. Upon his death in December 2000, his final wish was for his funeral to serve as an event for education about AIDS. Malevu's spirit, even on his deathbed, was strong enough for him to think first of others before himself, and even in death he took a fundamental step in a profoundly moving attempt to halt the spread of this deadly virus. He is a martyr, one among thousands, millions maybe... ...and yet Pope Benedict XVI would deny the possibility that more young men and women like Mzokonah Malevu do not need to die. My last treatise to the Vatican Basilica: do not let your outdated concepts of sexual morality blind you from reality. People are dying. You can help stop this needless destruction of life. Do something useful. Words are not useful. Condoms are.

Eat Sausage you Sodomite...

Who said Conservatism isn't extreme? I'm not taking a single dig at the US, but the country seems to have alot of extreme politicans and community leaders. By conservative I mean those white, Chrisitan, mostly artistocratic types that take some fundamental views to the extreme. Some of these conservative types take Religion a bit too seriously.... Take George W. Bush for example...he thinks he is annointed by God to smite evil? Doesn't that sound very Osama bin Ladinish? What is the difference between the two? George W. Bush has made it clear that he believes he is chosen from God. "God told me to strike at al Qaida and I struck them, and then he instructed me to strike at Saddam, which I did, and now I am determined to solve the problem in the Middle East. If you help me I will act, and if not, the elections will come and I will have to focus on them." So God told him all of this eh? Very lame reasoning, I find it quite difficult that you can justify killing people by the thousands on a mere hunch. Hell sometimes I think God tells me to strip in public, but do I strip???? But George W. Bush is only one of high rankers in the US that have this twisted view on politics and religion we have a One Star General, Lt. Gen. William G. Boykin, who states: “George Bush was not elected by a majority of the voters in the United States, he was appointed by God.” Gentlemen...kiss my ass... Or would that be considered gay? Well theres a few politicans and left-wing activists that can have some input on that. "Don't use the word 'gay' unless it's an acronym for 'Got Aids Yet'" Bob Dornan, Republican Senator "Not only is homosexuality a sin, but anyone who supports fags is just as guilty as they are. You are both worthy of death." Fred Phelps, Baptist Church Pastor So much hate in some places...but thats the inherent danger in mixing politics and religion. You get these fanatical freaks that slip through the cracks and end up being senators or yes, even President! Doesn't it seem out of place for a government to align with one Religion and indirectly exclude the other Religions? Christianity is just one of hundreds upon hundreds of different faiths out there. Would it be morally just if the so-called "leader of the free world" to discriminate officially against other followers of different faiths? According to TV host Ann Coulter, yes. "We should invade their countries, kill their leaders and convert them to Christianity. We weren't punctilious about locating and punishing only Hitler and his top officers. We carpet-bombed German cities; we killed civilians. That's war. And this is war." "Not all Muslims may be terrorists, but all terrorists are Muslims." "Being nice to people is, in fact, one of the incidental tenets of Christianity, as opposed to other religions whose tenets are more along the lines of 'kill everyone who doesn't smell bad and doesn't answer to the name Mohammed'" Isn't she a smart cookie? Here she goes talking about war and killing the infidels, but criticizes Islam for encouraging war. It just doesn't make sense. Maybe it's got to do with the violence oriented culture and history over there. In their anger against Muslims these people abandon all sense of reality and morals and start to believe that the end justifies the means. At this rate...how different will US foreign policy start to resemble the days of the Nazis? I now leave you with a quote that send shivers down my spine a statement that was made on live television... "Oh, you're one of the sodomites. You should only get AIDS and die, you pig. How's that? Why don't you see if you can sue me, you pig. You got nothing better than to put me down, you piece of garbage. You have got nothing to do today, go eat a sausage and choke on it." More Crazy Quotes: http://www.reandev.com/taliban/

PH34R M3!

0r u 5h4ll ph4c3 my wr47h!! u kno sumthing wot is annoying wen sum1 uses it where u shdnt use it? Excessive abbreviation, sms-talk, 1337-5p34k, or whatever you want to call it. Any of these have their place in most people's lives these days, I won't argue that. Sms's are supposed to be concise – the name itself tells you this: short message service. I won't begrudge you abbreviation (or lack of punctuation) when you are paying by the character. I can even find it in my heart to forgive you if, in IRC, MSN, ICQ,or whatever form of internet chat you use, abbreviations are present. Instant Messaging sometimes requires frantically quick typing, so leaving off letters may speed things up for you. What really gets my goat (now that's a great phrase!!) is when people post on a forum, bulletin board, blog or site, and write EXCLUSIVELY in this truncated language. And also refuse to format (or edit the formatting after it has been posted) so that it bears some semblance to something remotely readable. Line-after-agonising-line of incoherent babble, with no paragraphs, no punctuation, or grammar is hard on both the eyes, and the mind. if u come across a paragraph written sumthing like this 1,which rarely uses capitals,or line-breaks,has excessive unnecessary abbreviation or the whole long article is written without using the enter key once,then it can be really difficult for sum1 2 read and they often have sentences that will trail on forever and ever much like this one long sentence i just keep typing.i know that it sounds like too much effort,but slight formatting will make it more likely for the casual observer to actually read the content rather than skipping to the flaming that follows, by annoyed forum members/whoever.Sumtimes this may be the result of an emotional outpouring, rendered in a ‘get it out of my system’ kind of way, and i class this as an extenuating circumstance. and i will just continue to talk in an unformatted way here to make illustrating my point a little easier. if you want to read more skip the rest of this paragraph. sandwich ostrich banananana pecan turtle blah blah blah. and so on and so forth and repeat and then it goes on and on and on and blah-dee-blah, and then i go blhahhkd saand then you ask me what makes me do this and i say i dont know and then she says andhe says and then we all fall down dead. and then wasnt this an annoying and difficult to read paragraph. I am not asking perfection. I would not expect perfection, and occasionally truncated words will creep in; for example, using ‘spose’ instead of ‘suppose’. I see no real problem with this, and will probably unwittingly do so myself on occasion. Please, keep it readable, and don’t take offence if someone will ask you to re-format, or add paragraphs, or offers some constructive criticism. Until next time, stay classy, San Diego...

The Hippity Hoppity

Hip hop...it's more hip than hop nowdays. The Gansta rap days of The Notorious B.I.G and 2Pac... was that the golden age of hip and/or hop? These people had somehting to say at least, trying to get their message out...what was their message? The stuggle of the black man, it was 'us' versus "the man". "They say pussy and paper is poetry power and pistols Plottin on murderin motherfuckers 'fore they get you Picturin pitiful punk niggaz coppin pleas Puffin weed as I position myself to clock G's" Yes, that was vintage hip hop. Of course, you may ask "who said pussy and paper is poerty power and pistols?" the answer is simple, it was 'the man'! Fight the power! Because the power has to be goin' down, biatch. So if that's sophisticated hip hop, then you must be wonderin how the language has evolved over the years...In the modern age of mobile phones and SMS messaging, rappers have found it more convenient to abbreviate nearly all the words in the english language. The system is simple...lets look at some examples: For = fo (also may mean fucker depending on the context) Mother = mo sure = shizzle For words that rappers cannot pronounce such as the word "Casbah" they use a different system: 1) take the first letter of the word 2) add a 'to' suffix after that letter 3)Shizzle it up, that is, for the last letter of the word, add the suffix "izzle" "izza" or anything to that effect so for this example "casbah" we have "c to the hizzle" This is the basic grammar structure of gansta talk, other rules should come second nature once you get the hang of it. Don't forget those profanities! It's all about the bitches and the bling (gold accessories). Let's examine: "Yes mother, i will go down to the nearest Casbah to fetch some milk". Thats not HIP! You need to gangsta it up....nigga. Try this instead: "Fo shizzle bitch, i'll holla back from getting down the place to be c to hizzle, AIIIIGHT! Gonna purchase, yo purchase, some titty liquid, bring it up, bring it up, gonna bust a cap in no don't what no ain't none nigga." Also remember, gangsters love animals. In fact many colloquialisms in gangsta originated from animals... Vagina = Pussy Friend = Dog (can also be said as: Dawg) Girlfriend/female = Bitch (can also be said as: Biatch) Let's bask in another 2Pac MASTERPIECE Pissin while practicin how to pimp and be a playa Overdose of a dick, while drinkin liquor when I lay her Pistol whippin these simps, for bein petrified and lame Disrespectin the game, prayin for punishment and pain" YOU now have the skills to translate: "I was urinating while I practiced how to be a whore businessman and strapping buck Too much penis, while drinking alcohol whilst fornicating with a woman Pistol whipping those scallywags, for being cowardly Not respecting the game, they hope for punishment and pain" Try singing these lyrics (translated) to songs such as: Hash Pipe - Weezer Get Free - The Vines (you will have to repeat certain phrases, instead of saying 'get free' say 'i was urinating') Never There - Cake Feel free to add any other songs that suit these lyrics on the tag board or comments. Let's look at Hip Hop lyrics today...who better to analyse than 50 Cent. Hip Hop today has become really commerical, and confused... "Go, go, go, go Go, go, go shawty It’s your birthday We gon’ party like it’s yo birthday We gon’ sip bacardi like it’s your birthday And you know we don’t give a fuck (Oh wait) It’s not your birthday!" So for the first 45 seconds of "In Da Club" 50 Cent was involved in an argument WITH HIMSELF about whether it was 'shawty's' birthday. Because this is what I'm hearing "It's your birthday, and im going to drink, wait........it's not your birthday!" WELL WHOOPTEEDOO TO YOU 50 CENT. Isn't he an incredibly smart scallywag. So Hip Hop has devolved into nothing than short rambles about being 'shawty's' birthday, and in the words of the man himself... "don’t try to act like you ain’t know where we been either nigga In the club all the time nigga, it’s about to pop off nigga" Oh, and drink Bacardi...biatch.... Asian Rap: http://www.y2khai.com (I strongly suggest you go there, it has really good clips)

Im being deported!

So, are you an Australian citizen/visa holder living in Australia? If you are, then get the hell out of the country! This seems to be the new policy of the Department of Immigration (coined DIMIA, a weird acronym in my opinion). The evil and absolutely clueless Minister Amanda Vanstone has trouble determining whether Australian citizens/visa holders are illegal immigrants. (Just look at her!) Let's take a look at the Kumar family... Yes...much similar to the Kumars at No.42, but not exactly http://www.abc.net.au/news/newsitems/200506/s1383361.htm The head of the family, orginally from Fiji, succesfully applied for a student visa. Two years later his wife and two children obtain a bridging visa to stay in Australia while their application for asylum is processed...this was done in the year 2000 (when there was a coup within the Fiji government). Their application ws rejected, twice, later they get a call from the Department of Immigration. They told Navindra (the head of the family) that he was to come with them to Paramatta to renew their bridging visa, his family was welcome to come along. The next thing they know, they are stuck in Villawood detention centre! They were completely misled by Immigration officals... Then of course there is Cornelia Rau http://www.abc.net.au/news/newsitems/200506/s1383366.htm Poor old Cornelia was chucked into the Baxter detention center, even though she was an Australian citizen, Cornelia's mental hadicap meant that she was not fully capable of talking to authorities, she thought she was a German! But the Department of Immigration should've realised this, it should be the first thing they should check, i.e. her paperwork. A Certificate of Citizenship really stands out, or maybe not for the bungling idiots at DIMIA (what a stupid acronym). Turns out, Cornelia was falsely imprisoned for 10 months, with no full apology from the government. Now there are even reports that Immigration officials knew she was a citizen 7 months into her incarceration, meaning she could've been released 3 months earlier... And now the latest case...Vivian Alvarez http://www.abc.net.au/news/australia/nsw/northcoast/200505/s1367499.htm This has been covered recently so I won't go into it too much. But she was wrongfully deported, despite having proof of her citizenship! Not only that, there are claims that she was beaten in the process! This is a quote from a social worker that treated Vivian: "She had been brought in by a passer-by who had found her lying in a sort of gutter," she said. "She couldn't walk and she never walked when she was in Lismore hospital. "Well, the only way she could have been injured like that is if she was beaten up." As a LEGAL immigrant, I feel like i'm in a bit of a bind. Who the hell should I vote for next election??? I can't vote Labour: They support militant unions and are inherent scum. I can't vote Greens or Democrats: Do I want to throw my vote away? I can't vote One Nation: They want me out of the country. I can't vote Liberal/National: They want me out of the country too. So is it my fate to be deported? Am I required nowdays to walk around town not only with my wallet, but with my passport as well? Not as a form of proof of my citizenship (would they really pay attention to that?). No, I would carry my passport so I'm all ready to be deported then and there. Because in Australia, what good does a certificate of citizenship or visa prove? Hmmm, if only I was evil dictator...

Trial by Ignorance

Yeah, alright. I know what you're thinking. "Why the hell has Bodie jumped straight on to the Casbah's neat assortment of couches and upset the balance? Why doesn't he stick to his own blog?" Well, you see, it's because I'd like to introduce you all to this young lady: Now, unless you're a mole who lives a mile underground and does not associate with any form of media, you should know that this is Schapelle Corby. She's just been found guilty by the Indonesian courts of smuggling some 4.1kg of marijuana into Bali. I'm not going to enter into the debate about whether she's innocent or guilty, because hell, that's not for me to decide. The legal system of Indonesia says she's guilty. Therefore, let us work on the premise that she is. So, why am I writing about Schapelle if I'm not going to run the Save Schapelle ensign up the Bodie Mansion flagpole? The response to the verdict of the Indonesian courts by some Australians is, quite frankly, bloody disgraceful. Let's look at some of these reactions: "After all we've done for Indonesia, with the tsunami aid and everything, you'd think they'd have the decency to let her go." "If only Schapelle had taken a bomb into Indonesia instead of drugs, she would have got [sic.] three years instead of twenty." "Australia needs to show we're angry with this by boycotting Bali and suspending our tsunami aid support." ...and then some bright spark sent a biological agent to the Indonesian Embassy in Canberra. First off, what the hell does our support of Indonesia after the Boxing Day tsunami disaster have to do with the smuggling of drugs? Evidently, everything, according to these halfwits. http://www.lonelyplanet.com/tsunami/indonesia.cfm "Damage includes: 1.3 million homes and buildings; 8 ports and 4 fuel depots; 85% of the water and 92% of the sanitation system; and 120 km of roads and 18 bridges. Aceh is closed to tourism and permits are needed for anyone entering the area. The World Food Program estimated that it fed 500,000 displaced or affected people in Indonesia in February - up from the January figure of 330,000. Health risks are high..." We're talking about thousands upon thousands of people killed, and at the very least half a million people surviving solely on aid. Over a million people have lost close to everything. Australia provides over $1 billion in aid to assist Indonesia alone in the rectification of this... ...and some correspondants would have us believe it is not only morally justified, but correct, to suspend this, conceivably signing the death warrants of another few thousand people, because one convicted drug smuggler will have to spend 20 years in prison. Come... ...off... ...it. As for the whole bomb thing, Abu Bakr Bashir was imprisoned not for masterminding the Bali Bombings, as that great bastion of the free press, The Advertiser, reported on Saturday, but for association with an outlawed organisation. Two very different things, people... How, incidently, is sending something deadly to the Indonesian Consulate going to help Ms Corby's appeal in any way? Dickheads, all of you who think that was clever... The question is, would the media and the general public actually care about Ms Corby if she wasn't an attractive young girl with big boobs? Whatever happened to the so-called Bali Nine? Sure, the media poured out its heart for that 18 year old idiot among the group, who claimed "We didn't know the risks!", but none of the nine were 19 year old Gold Coast beauty students (and what the heck is that, anyway? How do you study beauty scholastically?) with a nice smile and pleasing cleavage. They haven't been in the pages of the local rag, nor on the television screens, for some weeks now. Finally, as for this entire uproar, regardless of whether Ms Corby truly is guilty or not, the fact remains that she has been found guilty according to Indonesian law. She has been sentenced according to Indonesian law, as well she should be. I can hear the protests already, but this basically boils down to the indignation of Australians wishing to be more like our American (inbred) cousins. After all, how dare the Indonesians impose their laws on us while we're in their country! Well, that's it from me for now. Till next time, couch fans!

For Love or Money

I hate Communist scum, it may be all rosy in theory...but can never be practiced. Im a capitalistic person. Open markets, free trade, the invisble hand etc. I'm an economist by nature, I like to analyse things, measure the worth of something through tangible or intangible means (Economics isn't all about money, things can be measured through other means, e.g. time, oppurtunity cost). How much is money really worth? Are you willing to do anything for money? Sure money is important, but it's not essential to happiness...or is it? Let's take a look at the good ol' US of A. The US is a symbol of the free world and capital venture. It's a perfect example of how prosperous a country can be through free trade! Right? Wrong! The US has the highest gun death proportionalitiy in the world, violence is ingrained the culture. Hell they may be the richest country in the world, but they ain't exactly the most peaceful. So is it money or morality? Im an evil dictator (Ferdinand Marcos, see Mr Lane, can anything blow up space?) so the answer is obvious for me... But my God, you don't expect parents to succumb to greed...Over the past year I have heard two stories of parents willing to lease their baby's name for advertising, or brand their baby's clothing. A couple in Pennsylvania has decided to offer branding rights to their newborn child's clothing. Their reasoning: http://www.cnn.com/2005/US/05/30/baby.billboard.ap/index.html?section=cnn_offbeat "I jokingly said to my husband that we should do this on my baby," Hutchison said. "The next day I couldn't get it out of my head." Well whoopteedoo to you, SCUM! Obviously she wants her child Chaswick (this isn't the child real name) to wear Coke branded nappies...."look ma' Chaswick soiled on Coca Cola nappies...mmmm refreshing Coke!" Does this mean every moment in the childs life will be a commercial for the advertiser that has branding rights for the month? "AWWWW! Chaswick said his first word...McDonalds! MMMM I'm loving it!" But this is only the first case I heard, there was another story that disturbed me even more.... http://boards.stratics.com/php-bin/ffxi/showflat.php?Cat=&Number=62774&Main=62774 "When Melissa Heuschkel couldn't decide what to name her fourth child, she turned to the auction site eBay. Earlier this year, the Torrington woman sold the right to name her unborn baby to online casino ***edited*** for $15,500. Golden Palace Benedetto was born at 3:34 a.m. Wednesday at Charlotte Hungerford Hospital." When this kid comes to school "Everybody, meet our new student, Golden Palace!" He's going to get bulled left right and centred for the first 8 years of his schooling life because he is named after a Casino! But hey, I see potential for him to be a pimp daddy when he finishes High School. Golden Palace is such a Mac Daddy name... "The company also has forked over $156 for a giant Frosted Flake and $650,000 to name a new species of monkey discovered in Bolivia" Has the world gone mad? We are naming new species after Online Casinos? Since when scientific intrest has been below commerical gain? So In the US, expect things to happen, big things to happen...You might see sponsored prostitutes "mmm pleasure me with Ron condoms...if it's not ron, its not on" or a wing of the library named "The Burger King Wing" hell you might even see "The Church of Casbah"...

Bondage - what is it good for....absolutely nothing...

G’Day! This is the first of many posts that I, Mr SeXGoD, will be adding into the couch! What I would like to remind the readers is that I shall remain anonymous, and will remain anonymous, as it is safer that you didn’t know who I am… Now, the best topic for me to begin my life on the couch is Bondage, Domination, Sadism, And Masochism or BDSM for short! Now, who in their right mind would ever look towards BDSM to get their beans hopping?! Wait, we shall leave this question till after we've properly looked at BDSM! Some historical reports point out groups of people who willingly were bound or whipped as either a prelude to, or substitute for sex, going back to the 14th century, which explains how badly people wanted to push the sex before marriage issue! That, or to avoid going blind from masturbation (Obv. not true...I think! P.S. Both these issues will be discussed in future) Robert Bienvenu, weird science/sex-ancestor, linked the origins of modern BDSM to 3 sources - European Fetish(1928), American Fetish(1934) and Gay Leather(1950) Now this strengthens 3 stereotypical beliefs - Europeans are crazy, Americans are crazy, and being gay can sometimes hurt...not that there’s anything wrong with it! (SEINFELD 4L) From there, the Internet can be blamed for the exponential growth of bondage and such things related. LOL, actually, the Internet can be blamed for a lot of things, such as this site, (not necc. a good or bad thing) The imagery of BDSM has spread rapidly into the mainstream of Western Culture, such as gothic subculture, rap, hip-hop, sci fi and movies. (If you ever consider dating a Goth, ensure you have an open mind...) Most major cities in the US have clubs and play parties, including informal gatherings called munches. If a friend invites you for munches, make SURE they actually meant MUNCHIES, or that you know what you’re getting into... Some even run conventions, such as *Living In Leather *Black Rose *Folsom Street Fair Now readers, you must have some admiration for me, as it took guts to check out these sites related to BDSM! I had no idea what to expect to be honest! Especially after seeing this warning from br.org WARNING By entering the next page,you agree to do so as a mature adult over 18 years of age. Now, you may have your own views on this type of sexual practice, but I will not ever, nor even think about letting a girl tie me up and whip me till the break of dawn (maybe just the tying up thing…fingers crossed she doesnt get up, take my wallet and leave) Its one thing to make sex interesting, but another to go crazy! I mean, sure, like any guy out there, maybe being spanked by a hot chick might get me going, but lets not get belts and spikey things involved…someone could get tetanus! Even worse, what would your houseguests say if they discovered that blindfold and handcuff under the couch? You could probably make up an excuse, but it might not make a difference if those handcuffs have been found with a book titled “The Dummies Guide to Bondage and such things not spoken of in public” To all who enjoy bondage secretly, good for you! I’m not putting it down, nor am I telling people to stay away from it! I’m merely pointing out my views, and elaborating them so much, that it will scare the heebee jeebees out of anyone thinking of resorting to bondage… Those who are thinking of looking towards BDSM because a loved one suggested it or because they think it might spice up your sex life…leave them, don’t say a word…you are better off finding someone else…because the only logical result is you being tied to a bed, blindfolded, with sumone dress in leather weilding a horsewhip yelling “Say my name bitch…” Next time with the SexGoD...i shall provide my rebuttals towards sex/life advice letters to magazines such as Girlfriend, and so on…so be prepared for a good read, guaranteed…